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Sunday, July 27, 2008

didnt know my next update gonna be like this..

unlucky tue='(
unexpected and sad incident happened on me=(
i wished everything was just a dream but it's too real for it to be a dream.
my beloved friend(gan jie) had left us forever due to the irresponsible driver(a new friend of hers)
that day i was very moody all of sudden.. therefore i move to a empty room to concentrate on my work. was chatting with hwee hoon on msn to ask about acct and at the same time asking from my sis on the phone. just when i put down the phone not long, and getting myself ready to start concentrating..

phone rang..

ben called.. thought he must be bored so called up to chat..

but but

ben: hey yee wen died..
me: huh what?! dont bluff la..
ben:you think i so free to call you to joke about such stuff meh! you go call kathy and asked..

*holding on my tear
immediately i rung up kathy and she was on the phone with xinghua..
so we conference..

me: hey kathy.. yee wen really die ahx?
kathy:i dont know.. i just woke up only..
me: huh then why ben said you told him? hua you know?

*second line from caiwei

caiwei: wendy.. yeewen died already.. *sob sob
me: huh what happened? omg why this happened? *cry
caiwei: she died from car accident.. when i confirm when's the wake then tell your.. meanwhile spread to others..

retrieve back to the conference with hua and kathy.. broke the news to them
couldnt even speak clearly and i just cried.. control myself abit and told them what caiwei said and ended the call..

text hwee hoon on msn to tell her..
then sean called too to tell me.. really dont wanna accept the fact..
just like what caiwei said.. even if you tell me is just a joke i also wont be angry with you.. if only it's just a joke.. if only..
called baoru up and she's already in tears.. we two cried tgr on the phone awhile before ending off..

and memories of her just couldnt stop flashing in my mind. my tears followed along..
couldnt stand the loneiness so went back class to put my laptop before going to toilet. trying my best to hide my face away from my classmates but they just saw it..
moment i went in the toilet.. i really felt like cryiing all out
andrea came in and asked what happened.. before she could say anything
i hugged her and cried out loud and told her my friend died in the car accident..
carina and peiling also came in and console me.. i washed my face and calm myself down
went back to classroom to continue on my work..
whenever i saw any msg from my 5/1 classmates.. my feeling and tears came back..
tried to contribute as much as possible to my team.. after presentation went straight home..

the following day.. met up with the rest to her wake..
everybody was wearing a mask and tried to joke around abit to distract ourselves
but as we walked nearer to her.. the mask broke..
everybody took their turn to bow and looked at her..
the one who bought laughter to our class;
the one who always being so crazy so lively and can just sing so randomly in class
but now she's so quiet lying there not moving anymore..
caiwei was the saddest among us cause they are really good sisters
she acted strong but we knew everything it's just fake
whenever i saw caiwei and what she said like 'how can she be so selfish want to forever stay 19 and pretty and ps them when they supposed to meet like that night...'
i couldnt control anymore.. cried again and again..
stayed till 8plus to 9 then went back as most of us have classes
next day was her cremation but i didnt go.. i know i am damn bad nv send her off for the last time but i know i am just using the excuse of dont wanna missed class and test..
but in fact is i dont wished to experience it again.. i really hate that moment='(

seriously hate that bastard driver.. how can he said he's not at fault at all
he caused someone who's dearest to us to be gone lo
and he can just escaped without a single injuries on him..
at least if he's in coma or injuried but no matter what he should be feeling guilty
but he wasnt.. where's justice?!
i want all the spirits to huant him even till the day he know how to reflect
nv will him be happy because all the sad stuffs will happen to him once he give a damn smile!
his life will be horrible till he can go commit suicide and everybody will burst out laughing non stop.. is non stop okay..
sorry i know i being horrible to curse people but he deserve it!

ytd went for the class gathering.. really was a late one..
if only we have held it earlier.. hai..
hua brought all of us home.. thanks=)
reached home around 2-3am and i slept at 5plus..

1aug is coming and i still havent finish my pp.. sucks la
got to really rush like hell.. hope it will be approve..
rushing for time..
and i hope caiwei can really let go..

*pp in progress*

Labels: i hope it's just a dream='(